I used to have a big beef with the American snack industry. The first time I went to London, in 2002, I went ape-shit over all the flavored potato chips they have over there. The selection of deliciousness overwhelmed me: Sunday roast, shrimp cocktail, curry, chicken with thyme, lamb and mint, SMOKY BACON! It was like a mini-mall of flavors. Check out the Walker’s website (which I think is owned by Frito-Lay because they have the same logo). I got really angry at Lay’s and Ruffles for not expanding their flavors beyond regular, salt ‘n’ vinegar, sour-cream and onion, and BBQ.

Fast forward several years later and America has finally caught on. Except it’s mainly indie chip makers that are experimenting, like Kettle (check out Kettle UK, they offer different flavors then America) and Terra with their sweet potato chips. The Big Boys are still fidgeting with oils and fat content and cooking methods - which I understand, but they are putting all their potatoes in one basket. Lay’s Dill Pickle flavor isn’t that bad, but it needs work. And Lay’s chips themselves are cruddy because they are paper thin – I don’t want to be able to read my blog through my chips. (However, a guilty pleasure of mine is bag of Ruffles with a pot of that store bought French onion dip full of preservatives.)

Even Emerald Nuts has caught on. They have flavored nuts now! Chipotle and wasabi, both oven roasted.

Matt and I got a bag of Utz’s Dark Russet Potato Chips. Holy shit! They make it with peanut oil (as opposed to canola or safflower), which is a neutral flavored oil, so all you taste is the potato. And they taste lighter and crispier because your mouth doesn’t get all greasy. I’ve never had chips like them. Even Pokey loves them. Buy them now!

What new snack products do you like?

Eat Out NY follows around Kelly Choi, who goes to various high end restaurants in Manhattan and talks to the chefs and hang out in their kitchen. It’s a great show, especially if you can’t afford to actually visit those restaurants. My problem is with Kelly’s appearance. She’s not always dressed like a whore on the show, but most of the time she is. It’s highly inappropriate and unnecessary. Don’t get me wrong, I love slutty looking girls: I find them highly entertaining and they provide great conversation material. I just don’t need one to distract me when I’m trying to learn about restaurants. Wearing low cut gowns and setting her make-up gun to whore is enough to make Giada blush.

$9.99 is a show about stuff to do in NYC for $9.99. The great thing is that they don’t limit the show to Manhattan. Maryam Basir is one of the hosts and like Kelly Choi, she dresses really slutty. Except unlike Kelly, she’s vapid and totally ignorant about food. She always has a big dumb smile on her face when people are trying to teach her things and you can almost see the SpongeBob SquarePants cartoon that’s playing in her head. If you wanna cut the the chase, you can check out risque photos of Maryam on her website. And her resume, which includes her measurements.

Both programs are on NYCTV25

Now I understand why some people are picky eaters. It’s not because they are assholes or afraid, it’s because of the number of tastebuds they have:

25% of people are “supertasters“. Women are more likely to be supertasters than men, as well are people from Asia, Africa and South America. It sounds cooler than it really is. The name conjures up images of some sort of superhuman ability or someone whose tongue is constantly on the miracle fruit. But in actuality, it’s not so great. Yes, supertasters are better at identifying subtle flavors in wine and caviar. However, they are super sensitive to bitter foods. This creates an aversion to: Coffee, grapefruit, Brussels sprouts, spinach and other dark greens, green tea and ALCOHOL. Supertasters over the age of 65 are also more likely to have colon polyps. Sucks for you, dude.

25% are non-tasters. With a very small concentration of tastebuds, they don’t really care much about taste or how food is prepared and generally just scarf down food. These are the type of people who keep T.G.I. Friday’s and Ellio’s Pizza in business. I think dogs and dads fall into this category.

50% of people are normal tasters. We norms enjoy a wide variety of foods. The food world is our oyster! Aaaaah. Jealous, much?

Supertaster article on BBC
Article about supertasters and wine critics
How to test if you are a supertaster

Mushroom soup! And I’m not talking about that shitty Campbell’s Cream of Mushroom Soup that tastes like flour and water mixed together with one rotten mushroom thrown in. This is mushroom-action packed!

When Matt and I were in Brussels, we lunched at La Roue d’Or, an uber-Belgian Restaurant where well-t0-do business men like to eat. It was not a vegetarian friendly place: they served pig trotters, lamb’s tongue, rabbit and bone marrow. We got the prix fixe lunch that included cream of mushroom soup and boullaibase - it was the best cream of mushroom soup I had ever eaten. This is a pretty good copy of it, but with less cream.

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This is an addendum to my previous post about MSG.

It’s amazing how much I learn while on the toilet. I was reading the MSG entry in “The Food Lover’s Tiptionary” just now. (Which is a reference book that I highly recommend to anyone who who takes cooking seriously - before you buy any cookbook or use any recipe, buy this book). Here’s what the entry said:

“The FDA doesn’t require a separate MSG listing when any of the following (MSG-laden) ingredients are present: hydrolyzed vegetable protein, hydrolyzed plant protein, Kombu extract, and natural flavoring seasoning.”

There may come a day very soon where I will have to decide to go to culinary school or take a job as a line cook.

The job will be for a year at minimum wage under an established chef at somewhat famous restaurant with an excellent reputation. I am assuming it will be for five nights a week. Not only will I learn to cook, I will learn to cook well. After a year, the chef will help me get a job at another restaurant.

School would be for three nights a week for nine months and cost me about $35k, but will provide me with an externship, probably at a pretty decent restaurant. An externship does not guarantee a job. But I will make connections.

What do you think? What would you do?

Spuyten Duyvil tonight.

I found this article about Fairway selling foie gras. And in a place like Brooklyn, there is a large population of people who want my Fairway to stop selling it.

Foie gras has been outlawed in California and Chicago. I can’t wrap my head around the fact that the government says it illegal for me to ingest certain foods.

They way I see it, is that if you are in for a penny, you’re in for a pound. You can’t say you are against foie gras and then go and eat caged, hormone injected, corn fed beef - because where do you draw the cruelty line?

I understand vegetarians and vegans getting upset at the sight of it, but do you have to boycott a store that sells it along with your seitan and tofu and flaxseed? That’s like them refusing to go to a restaurant that serves meat.

I’m big on organic produce, dairy and meats, but I have friends who think organical stuff is all malarkey and I don’t get all preachy on them.

These people are concerned with one supermarket chain carrying foie gras, but there are certain Asian countries that torture and murder dogs for human consumption. I don’t know how you are supposed to chose your cause: How it relates to you? Are we New Yorkers that ego-centric?

Rachael Ray is unstoppable - like Mecha Streisand. Or Oprah if you don’t know what Mecha Streisand is.

Personally, I don’t like her: I find her annoying, insipid and unctuous. Her cooking looks gross to me. Though, I do get the concept of her and why she’s popular. I understand why some people like her personality and her cooking. I get why Mid-western moms love her. And I do think it’s a good thing that she’s getting more people in the kitchen and trying new things. Though, I do not get why weird dudes have crushes on her and I think that is a telltale sign of some kind of personality disorder. I do not hold it against her that she will do anything for money.

Here’s my problem:

Two days ago the New York Times reported that Ray Ray recently started a non-profit organization called Yum-o Organization. It aims to, as the official website states, “Cook. Feed. Fund.” and that “The Yum-o! Organization empowers kids and their families to develop healthy relationships with food and cooking.”

Nice! So she doesn’t produce the healthiest recipes on her show (”Healthy” being a totally relative word - yes, her meals are healthier than a Big Mac, but terribly unhealthy compared to this kind of home cooking). But Rachael Ray does inspire and influence thousands, if not millions, of people. And going around, promoting healthy (it should really say “healthier”) eating habits for Americans is admirable, right?

No. Because it’s a fucking sham.

I call extreme shenanigans because Rachael Ray is also a spokeswoman for Dunkin’ Donuts. What’s a kid supposed to think when they hear Rachael Ray telling them eating fruits and veg can be totally yum-o and then they see her on peddling French crullers on TV? Maybe it’s good for them to learn early on to not trust anyone and that people are liars and will pretend to do nice things as a tax write-off.

I had my third and fourth trails this week.

I was put on the line for the duck confit risotto and the duck breast. Not since middle school had I felt frustrated with my height and frame. I can’t see into the salamander, I can’t reach the cling film without help, my wrists can’t handle the weight of tossing the larger pans full of food, and the cutting board is at an awkward height for me to get a good, consistent angle with my knife without tiring my hand out. I know it’s something I have to work around. I know there are lots of cooks with my build or even smaller and even cooks with more serious disadvantages then just being short and slight. I just hope it doesn’t take too long for me to adjust.

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I get a good amount of visits to my blog from Google searches by people wondering how many times you should chew your food.

So I thought I’d write something and appease them:

You choose your food until it’s ready to be swallowed. Really.

They say one of the tricks to consuming less (along with serving yourself smaller portions on small plates) is to thoroughly chew and take the time out to actually taste your food. The extreme of this is called Fletcherism. No, not Felcherism, you pervert. This guy Fletcher came up with a lame diet in which you chew your food until it’s liquid. This pretty much guarantees that your food will be flavorless and it will take you two hours to eat one meal.

Here’s my dieting tip: Eat well and get moderate excerise - for life. If you are one of the many millions of Americans who need a quick fix solution, then you could buy some diet pills that will be recalled by the FDA in six months. Or you could chop off your hands or get your jaw wired shut.

Happy eating!